Tuesday, August 2, 2011

First Date Ninja

Photo courtesy pretty-kitty

Oh, the joys of a first date. A magical time of anticipation and that extra 20 minutes in the bathroom primping. I am a first date master. If they made belts, mine would be black with gold stars all around it. I've come to learn a few things about the nature of humans during a first date, so here's my list of do's and don'ts for all the singletons out there:

1) Don't be late. While lateness is rude in general, showing up late to a first date is a sign that you aren't as interested as the guy or gal waiting for you. You are not a rock star. Get there on time.

2) Do bring cash. Don't just assume that the guy is paying (if he's a gentleman, he will, but it's good to be prepared).

3) Don't say negative things about your ex. I don't care how much of a <insert expletive here> he or she was to you. When you start badmouthing an ex, your date will think twice about seeing you again. We don't want to end up on your list of people you bitch about someday, so show some respect for your previous relationships, even if they didn't end well.

4) Show off, but don't be a show-off. Now is the time to let your personality shine. It is not, however, time for you to share your crazy knife-juggling skills or to be a know-it-all. You want your date to get to know the real you, so just relax and let the conversation flow. Save the tricks and obscure fun facts for another time.

5) Be upfront, but don't be overwhelming. Want marriage, kids and two dalmations with matching collars? It's fine to be honest about what you are looking for in a potential partner. However, don't make it the main topic of conversation. In other words, don't start mentally monogramming your newlywed initials on the handtowels before you even get to dessert. Savor the moment, and let everything fall in to place if it's meant to.

6) Do kiss goodnight. Or don't. I believe there isn't a set answer for this one. I tend to just go with what I'm feeling as we're saying goodbye. If I want to kiss him, he gets a kiss. Now this being said, I highly suggest a sweet and simple smackaroo as opposed to a full on make-out session by your car. Class, my friends, have some class.

In the end, the most important things to remember are to be yourself and to have fun. Oh, and don't forget the breath mints. ;)

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